Love and Security
Today my son asked me if I would keep him even if he looked funny. I never even knew that this was a possible thought in his mind and it made me ache to hear that. I told him that he is mine forever and I would never give him to anyone. For at least now! I explained that even if he had one eye, two noses, or looked like a blue monster, I would keep him. It is so important to express your love and make sure your children feel secure in their love from parents. Every single day, a couple of times a day, my son tells me that he loves me and misses me. It made me worried that he always said he missed me. Does he not get enough attention from me? Does he really miss me or just mean he loves me? He has such a sensitive soul, often cries during movies, hates the dark, and scary things. Sometimes I am not sure how to handle his sensitivity so that I do not cause unwanted terrible feeling for him. He always expresses love to me and calls me pretty mommy or beautiful woman. Any thoughts about sensitivity especially in young children?
Listen, listen and listen some more. Validate what he tells you. Do not ever make fun of him for being afraid of anything because we all have fears. Reassure him when he's anxious and make sure not to brush it off. This comment is rather shallow and short but I'm work and shouldn't be responding! I think you're doing a fine job. Sensitive kids (especially) do not like sarcasm (I know from experience) so try not to use it. Blah blah blah. Sorry!
ReplyDeleteI would try to be as sincere as possible. Say exactly what you mean and mean what you say. Stay away from sarcasm and empty threats (when he's in trouble). Just love him and give him individual attention and let him know how special he is to you. You are a wonderful mom, Amanda.
ReplyDeleteHe might just say, "I love you and I miss you" because that's what you taught him to tell his grammas on the phone? That's what I'm trying to teach Luke to say to them anyway. ;)
I feel that I am pretty sincere with him and I am not sarcastic. I think I only really am with Victor but even that has toned down. He only says he loves and misses to me even though he will say I love you when he is on the phone, but he literally says that 5-10 times a day. It is sweet and I would never change it, I just worry that he says it from a lack of security. He is the most sensitive and spiritual souls I know though too so maybe that goes hand in hand. Thanks for your comments.
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